So yeah, I used many tissues today already.
I admit, I did get really complacent after my MYEs.
It's not everyday that you see high results reap from not studying much so I went like oh yeah, it will happen again, won't it?
But I guess God sense something is going wrong with my mentality.
Yeah, I did do really well for Semester 1.
Never failed any test or anything.

For EOYs, none of the subjects were up to my expectations.
Instead, they were much below my expectations.
It's like the exact opposite of my feeling for MYEs.
I really don't know how many times have I cried today.
Okay firstly, I got 48 for my maths.
In other words, I failed it.
I know the entire cohort's average is probably at 50 something but still.
I hate failing, but like who doesn't
But I fear failure, sad to say.
So I probably can't get to success right?

Even Science was like..
It's not exactly that bad, but it's really bad compared to what I expected.
Lit was just pure crap, I was so shocked that I didn't know how to react.
So I cried really badly in Maths, since it's the second last paper so I can just release all the pent up agony I felt.
English, so I didn't fail it.
Chinese, I was even confident of getting a A(my ass)
Turns out that Paper 2 is like...

So yes, I have to repent.
I can't blame it on K-pop or J-pop or whatsoever things I was doing.
I should just blame myself for my lack of self-control.
I thought that miracles that happen, will always happen.
So yeah, 4As in MYEs to no As in EOYs.

Sometimes I admire my brother, my second brother.
He can fail his subjects for all he care, but he still remains so happy and crappy.
Sigh, so funny.

My mum told me that last time my eldest brother had to bring them to see the teacher to collect his results because according to HCI, though his results were an overall pass, but to them it was a failure.
She said he was so stunned he couldn't even say a thing.

I guess I am so shocked with the fireworks around my head that I just keep crying.
I am totally disappointed with myself.
I thought that PSLE is going to be the last time I am going to cry so hard, but yeah I think I cried even harder this time round.
248,48?
Tsk I really don't like the number 4 and 8.

Oh, but at least I didn't fail Geog.
Pass by quite abit.
Something to be happy about but still...

Off to pray.